More Pics and Backstory's

Top: This is Grandpa Duane & Grandma Kathy On November 2, 1947 - their wedding day.
This is Grandma Kathy (still not a grandma yet-:)) making Christmas Dinner at Granny Beulah's house (her mom). I believe this was 1968
This picture was taken in 1972; from left Grandma, Granny Beulah, Great-Grandma Julia (Grandpa Duane's mom-she's still alive!) and Great Grandpa Willis (Grandpa's Dad). I didn't get to meet either of my great-grandfather's they both died shortly before I was born in 1972. Grandma Kathy died Sep 15, 2006, Granny died in 2004, and Great Grandma Julia is still alive.
These are pictures of Grandpa Duane and Grandma Kathy with Haden in 1993-much happier times.

This is me, Tristan,&Kat in 2002 at Grandpa & Grandma's House in Arkansas. Again, happier times.

Some pics of my grandma's life & my mom,family,etc.

Top left is me and my mom; circa 1974 or 75? Top Right is one of the happiest times in my life so far. From left is Tristan (in backpack), Jim, Haden, Me, and Grandma in front of the glass church in Bella Vista. It's a beautiful place. When I was a little girl I wanted to be married in that church. This picture was taken shortly after I was re-assigned to a special-duty assignment in Oklahoma City (with the Air Force) and I was close to family for the first time since I had left home to join the Air Force - 7 years previously. I was stationed there for two years and was able to spend a lot of time with Grandma and everyone else, and I'll always be grateful for those years (1997-1999). In this picture Haden is about 4 years old and Tristan is almost a year old. Jim and I were 29 and 25 respectively. Grandma would have been about 70. She was very healthy and active until she was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2002. Against her better judgement she allowed them to perform a masectomy and remove 11 lymph nodes. After that her health gradually deteriorated. The lump that was diagnosed as "cancerous" had been on her breast for several years. To this day I wonder if it should have been left alone. I guess there is no use in wondering about the past. It is something we can never change.

Top Left is Grandma (on Right) and friend at left. I'm not sure who the friend is but she (eerily) looks like one of my friends (heidi). Anyway, I think Grandma (not a grandma at this point) was about 17 in this picture. On the top right is a picture taken when she was about 15. Bottom right is a picture taken with her namesake, our daughter Katherine, named after Grandma. I think this picture was taken on a visit in 2002.

Dealing with Grief

Hi everyone in blog-land, I know its been a long time since I posted. But a LOT of things have changed in the past year. On September 15, 2006 the mother of my heart (my Grandmother Katherine i.e., Kathy) passed away. She really was my mother, in fact if not for her I probably wouldn't exist or even be alive right now. She was only in her 40's when I was born and I lived off and on with my grandparents through some very tumultuous years.

I was able to be with her at the end and I am grateful for that. But it was also the most horrible experience in my life. She had a brain aneurysm and it took her two days to die from it. She was 77 years old and just shy of her 59th wedding anniversary with my Grandfather (whom she met on a blind date).

I flew down to Arkansas and was by her bedside over night. To see her in that bed, to see the person I loved most in the world (along with my children and my husband) slowly dying while I sat by helplessly was more than I could bear. But I did bear it. To watch my Grandfather break down periodically, to listen to her labored breathing while her body filled up with fluids. I know what a "death rattle" is now. Pray that you never hear it from someone you love. I mean it..there are not any words that can describe the feelings it invokes in you...there just isn't any.

Then in the last hours she would stop breathing, and then start again. The nurses told me this was also common, but it was agonizing. I wanted to tear my hair out, to scream at them to DO SOMETHING! PLEASE! DO SOMETHING TO HELP HER! SHE DOESN'T DESERVE THIS! She is the Glue of our family! Help her! She is the BEST person I've ever known, everything that is good in me is from her! Help her please! JUST FUCCING HELP HER!

But I did not do this; to do this would have been to dishonor her. Instead I read her favorite psalms, the ones she had taught me. I talked to her. I don't know if she heard or understood me. I like to think that she did. I thanked her for everything she had done for me; I told her how much I loved her. I talked about old times. I talked about the kids and told her funny stories about them and about my work. I brushed her hair. I told her it was okay to "pass on" (the nurses kept encouraging us to do this). But then I would break down and lay across her, trying to absorb as much of her as I could. Trying to hold her forever, just hold her.

I would have given anything...at that point in time I would have even given my own life. Even now, now that it’s February 8th and it has been 5 months since the woman who was in all respects my mother was reduced to ashes, I still have a hard time writing this. This is the first time I have written about it, and it will probably be the last time. That is how painful this is-even now.

What else can I say? In the end the nurses encouraged me to go to my rental car (where my suitcase still was since I came straight from the airport) and get my brush and some hair ties and "fix" her hair. My Grandfather and Uncle had gone back to the house to shower and change clothes before returning. I remember thinking "Yes, I should braid her hair."

She had the most beautiful long black hair, all of her life.

I guess they were actually trying to get me out of the room, as it turns out the minute I walked out she gave her last breath and passed on. The nurses said that they had encouraged me to leave the room because as they have noticed on the floor they work on

(The floor where people go to die-how special does a person have to be to work on this floor? I could not bear it…anyway…)

The nurses indicated that often people will not "let go" until the ones they love are out of the room...almost as if we are holding them on earth with our grief and fear. In this case they said it was almost eerie. It was as if she was waiting for me to leave. One nurse said "She must have Loved you very much". She will never know how much those words will always mean to me - even until my last breath.

When I came back I knew immediately she was gone. How to describe the next few hours or days? I'm not even sure if I can. I lay across her and cried, I fixed her hair, I sang to her (songs she used to sing when I was a child). But I could feel it; I could feel that whatever had made up my Grandma Kathy was gone.

My Grandfather came back and I had to tell him and my Uncle that she had passed while they were gone. The emotional pain was unbelievable, unbearable. My Grandpa was left alone with her and even with the heavy hospital door closed you could hear him sobbing and talking and singing to her. I saw some of the nurses and even a doctor start to cry. At this point I'm pretty sure I was in shock and would remain this way for several days. Maybe this is our mind's way of "protecting" us from total breakdown. I don't know.

I helped my Grandpa put together a "memorial board" of her life for the Memorial Service. Pictures of her life and her family, the family that meant everything to her. She was so beautiful she could have easily been a model (seriously) but a career never crossed her mind. She wanted to be a mother, a wife. And she was definitely made for the job.

The first night after her death I knew her body was at the funeral home and I had this crazy vision of myself going there and breaking in to be by her side. So she would not be by herself in the cold and in the dark.

And I cried, I cried more than I thought a human could possibly cry. I'm talking about the laying on the floor in a fetal position groaning crying. The kind of crying that feels like you can actually die from it. I was angry, I was scared, most of all I felt different. Like I would never be the same. I realize now that this is true. The death of someone you love with your whole heart changes you in fundamental ways. I only realize this now.

It gets worse...

Our family had planned on visiting Grandma & Grandpa at Christmas. We decided to go anyway
to help my Grandpa through the first Christmas without Grandma. We were driving down and leaving on December 22 to drive from California to Arkansas. We were also going to stop in Oklahoma to visit family there.

On December 20th my Dad called and told me that my birth-mother had collapsed and died suddenly from an aortic aneurysm with complications of high blood pressure and undiagnosed diabetes. I didn't even get to say goodbye, nothing. That was it.

At this point I can't even describe how I felt. I felt like I was in a nightmare and couldn't wake up. I had so many unresolved issues with my birth mother, but I know she loved me. She was just so young when I was born and I know this made her life more difficult. But she had done many things for me over the years and I know she really loved me, I hope she knew how much I also loved her...despite our unresolved issue's. I just always thought there would be time. I thought I had more time. I am 34. She was 50 years old. She was also cremated. I will never see nor talk to either her or my grandmother again. Sometimes the finality of this is overwhelming...even now. It washes over me and I feel sick and disoriented. Like I have lost my foundation and I'm drifting.

When people talk about their family sometimes I become angry or think thoughts like "I will never do that again...I will never talk to my Grandmother on the phone, I'll never have lunch with my Mom, and I’ll never go shopping with my Mom or my Grandmother, never ever again. Death is Final. And it’s coming for us all.

I guess my point is that we REALLY don't know how much time we have. We just don't. Cherish your loved ones, I don't give a dam if it sounds corny or hokey, Cherish them. Appreciate them. Call up a Mom or Dad or Grandparent or Sibling that you've been arguing with or haven't talked to in a while. Because you may never get another chance. We take too much for granted.

Bottom Line: I'm a different person now. You can not go through what I have in the past 5 months and not change. I feel like a part of me is "gone". I listen more. I hug my husband and kids more and tell them how much I love them all the time.

I still cry a lot, sometimes it just hits me. It’s a pain that doesn’t go away or “fade over time” as some people like to say. It stays with you. It’s a pain that you learn to live with. I know it is true now…more than ever. What doesn’t kill you will only make you stronger. And in a strange way, even though I feel more vulnerable right now, I know I am stronger.

I raised my Life Insurance. I'm in the process of writing letter's "just in case" for my children, husband, and remaining family and friends-in case something should happen. There are things I want them to know. Things I want them to be able to hold on to if I'm suddenly gone.
I'm not taking ANYTHING for granted.

And finally, I wanted to share some quotes about grief. The one I found to be the most accurate was actually a surprise to me. I have been reading many books about grief, but on the side I am reading an auto-biography with my oldest son about Johnny Cash. It was in this book "Cash" that I found the most accurate quote that I could relate to about grieving for someone you love and how it changes you, in this excerpt he is talking about losing his 14 year old brother Jack:

"Losing Jack was terrible. It was awful at the time, and it’s still a big, cold, sad place in my heart and soul. There's no way around grief and loss: you can dodge all you want, but sooner or later you just have to go into it, through it, and, hopefully, come out the other side. The world you find there will never be the same as the world you left" (Johnny Cash with Patrick Carr).

I'd like to add to that. The person you are will never be the same as the person you were either. So these are some of the reasons I have been absent, I have been (and I am still) trying to figure out who I am now and maybe this is a life-long journey. I miss my Mom. I miss my Grandma. I have many regrets. I have many good memories too. I guess this is life. There is tragedy, sorrow, and pain. But there is also happiness, love, and hope. I am still a Mother, I am still a Wife. I know my husband and children love me. I hold on to this. I hold on to hope. I hold on to my faith and hope someday in some way I will be reunited with my loved ones. Maybe “heaven” as a kingdom is a “fairy tale” as many “”educated” people like to say, but it is one that I desperately want to believe in.
Peace to everybody.
The Mom Next Door

DE-MOTIVATORS

Okay, you know those ANNOYING motivational posters...these are an answer to those...some of my faves;)

Indifference

Indifference
Originally uploaded by Joe Taruga.

HILLSIDE BY OUR HOUSE

Sometimes you just want to relax and think about nothing at all....

Happy New Year From The House of Crazy aka "The Funny Farm"

Hey everyone - sorry for the long absence from blogland again, however I've been back to work full time so things have gotten crazy busy again. I just wanted to drop a few lines and wish everyone a happy 2006. We stayed home this year and ended up counting down the new year about 27 times because our 3 year old daughter thought it was hilarious. YES - I LET MY THREE YEAR OLD stay up and count down the new year...aren't I a TERRIBLE mommy?! LOL! Don't worry...I cut her off after 2 glasses of champagne...you know how toddlers get when they drink...but that's for another blog.

Anyway, as I was filling out Haden's birthday card (Haden is my first-born who happens to have the COOLEST birthday date of January 1st) I was getting pretty introspective because he turned 13 today. I was looking for a fitting quote for his card and I came across this one by Mark Twain:

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. "

And while I had SOME reservations about putting a quote in my 13 yr old son's card that pretty much told him to do whatever he wanted...I decided that this was very fitting. I'm 33 now and when I look back over the last 20 years I will testify that this is definitely THE gospel truth. So....as we enter the new year, remember this - we live our lives by moments-make every moment count.

Best Wishes for 2006.

Bran

Goodbye to a Great Lady

I logged on to the internet tonight to check my email, complete some school work, etc. And the first headline that greeted me was

"Civil Rights Pioneer Rosa Parks Dies at 92"

I felt like I was going to cry.



I have always been fascinated by Rosa Parks. I have always thought she was truly a wise and courageous lady ever since the first day that I read about her fateful day and her fateful bus ride that aided in changing the course of history.

Probably because I'm not really a "courageous" person. Oh, I talk a good game. But when it comes right down to it, more often than not - I'm afraid to "act" if I'm "put on the spot". Probably because I'm a "white" girl born and raised in the suburbs - who is 33 years old, born after the major work of the civil rights movement (1972) - including rights fought for and obtained for (and by) women.

After all - by the time I was sexually active it was legal for me to take the birth control pill, I was told from day one I could do anything I wanted to do - including go to college, work, AND raise a family (however - see my earlier rantings about this). I was never told I wasn't "good enough" to sit down on the bus, drink from a water fountain, or use a certain bathroom. When I turned 18 I immediately was granted the right to vote. Let's face it - I've led a pretty sheltered life - maybe that's why I'm not that courageous, brave, wise...and I'm not going to even touch the term "lady". Smile.

But not Rosa Parks - not this great lady. She was born and raised in the deep south during the era of the infamous "Jim Crow" laws. She grew up with signs telling her where she could and couldn't go to the bathroom, eat, and use the water fountain. She wasn't even able to finish high school until later in her life. Not because she didn't want to, but because she needed to go to work in order to support her family.

She was told from day one that she was "less" of a person than her "white" peers. She probably lived in fear more often than not because lynchings and the Klu Klux Klan were very active and very real during this period in history - and murdered many people - whether we choose to believe it or not. In the same year she was arrested and taken to jail for refusing to give up her seat for a white man there were two other women arrested for the same reason, so she probably had a good idea she was going to go to jail (if not something worse) when she decided to remain seated.

What was going through her mind?

She had just finished a working a long day. Her feet hurt and I'm sure her spirit and body were tired. What is that special spark in some people? That spark of courage where some people stand out and stand up for what they believe. They refuse to be trod upon any longer and actually DO something about it. They face their fears head on, face the enemy and say "bring it on - I know I'm right - I'm standing my ground - do your worst". What would have happened in history if this scene had played out differently? As I'm sure it had many times before. The black woman who has worked all day on her feet stands up (with her head down-facing the floor) and moves out of the white mans way. He sits in her seat...the bus keeps rolling...

But it didn't...

One woman - made one decision. She faced ahead knowing the possible consequences and said "no". She said no to this WRONG thing, no to this WRONG idea - no to a rule that treated her like nothing more than a dog - like less of a human being because of the color of the pigment in her skin. She refused. She was very polite, but she refused. She accepted the consequences. She had the courage and the grace to face her enemies and history took a different turn. Thank You Rosa. I always admired you, I always will. This white girl from Oklahoma who was born almost 20 years after that day on the bus. Born after you had lived most of your life through trial and tribulation. Rosa ended up moving to Detroit because she couldn't find a job in Alabama after what had happened. She and her family were threatened and harrassed. Two years after the fateful day on the bus she moved away from family and friends. The negative consequences still following her, and still...she never regretted her decision.

People use words like "hero, lady, and courageous" pretty loosely these days. That's too bad, because there are VERY few people who REALLY qualify. I'm SURE not one of them, but I'm thankful that there have been people who are. Thanks Rosa - You were a true hero, you were truly brave, and truly a lady. I would have loved to have met you, but even though I never did you have influenced my life anyway. My life and countless others. I hope you are reunited with your husband and finally at rest. Rest in peace great lady.

Hi everyone

Oct 23/2005

Hi everyone in blogland and sorry for the long absence. I've been busy with the usual, kids school stuff, my own school work, housework (although not a LOT of this, lol!) etc., etc., etc. Anyway, I just wanted to drop a line and a link to a blog that I recently read. It deals with racism and stupidity (which pretty much go hand in hand). It notes the movie "Crash" and if you haven't seen this movie yet...RUN don't walk to the nearest video store, rent it, watch it. Its one of the best movie's I've seen in a long time. Not just because it tackles difficult questions that deal with race. But also because it tackles every-day lives. It addresses the fact that there's always a story-behind-the-story. I often remind myself this when someone angers me for whatever reason, they cut me off in traffic, another mom in a PTO meeting makes an offhand cruel remark, I meet someone and for whatever reason...they rub me the wrong way. There's always a story-behind-the-story. Maybe the person in traffic just recieved a bad phone call - someone died. Maybe the alpha-PTO mom left behind a fulfilling career to make a home and hearth, raise the children, and just realized her husband is boffing his 22 year old co-worker. There's always a story, a picture-behind why someone "is" the way they "are". Just something to think about. Have a good week...
tmnd

FRIDGE MAGNETS FOR THE MODERN WOMAN

These are SO great. A friend sent them to me. I think THIS one is my favorite...lol!

LONG TIME NO SEE...

9-28-05
Good morning to all of my friends, family, and visitors. It has been about 10 days since my last post due to the usual 24hr chaos filled days + some other developments. Sometimes I wonder if life is just one big tragi-comedy and the creator is some weirded out LA-type movie director who likes to have a good laugh while his gerbils run around their wheels frantically and for no apparent purpose other than for his amusement...but I'm not bitter or anything...;)

Spare me the stories of true human goodness, beauty, and hope right now. Because if I see another Fox hope -filled -creative -hollywood spot...er I mean News segment, I'm pretty sure I'm going to hurl.

Fiction is fun...but now for some reality. This is an Op Ed posted in the Miami Herald. Yes foks its true. And I'm sure there were much worse stories to share-we just haven't heard them. Anyone who has ever been in a crisis situation (and usually for most americans this is the supermarket being out of their favorite brand of Snackwells) will tell you that life is definitely NOT like the movies.

Heroes are usually NOT revealed and in fact what we usually are privy to is the true nature of human beings. Which seems to be usually bordering on evil and depraved if nothing else. Read on...

Crises reveal character

leonard pitts JR.

The women were on the roof of the hotel, calling for help as floodwaters rose. Then a motorboat full of policemen came by.
“Can you help us?” the women cried.
The policemen replied, “Show us what you’ve got!” and motioned for them to lift their T-shirts.
The women said no. The policemen left them there.
I figured that story for an urban legend when one of my students wrote about it in a class I teach. Too crazy to be true, I thought.
But the tale turns out to be an eyewitness account from one Ged Scott, a bus driver from suburban Liverpool, England, who, with his wife and son, was on vacation in New Orleans when that city was swamped by Hurricane Katrina.

Scott’s story has received considerable play in British newspapers. As near as I can tell, it has not been picked up stateside.

Small wonder. Katrina has given us enough homegrown tales of People Behaving Badly without importing new ones.
Meaning the people whose first thought in a time of cataclysm was to smash windows and grab cell phones. And the ones who thought it a good idea to shoot at rescue helicopters. And the ones who used disaster as a cover under which to rob and rape without fear of retribution.
We find ourselves caught in one whopper of a storm season. Indeed, the National Hurricane Center is down to the last four storm names on its list for 2005. And yet, even among all the storms, and even among all the stories they have produced, are producing and will yet produce, this particular tale from Hurricane Katrina stands out.
Show us your breasts, and we’ll get you out of here?
You’ll have to go some distance to find a better illustration of the utter banality of evil.
I’m reminded of a piece of wisdom picked up somewhere along the way: Crises, it said, do not so much build character as reveal it.

Calamity, in other words, has this way of knocking down artifice and pretension, the devices people construct to keep other people from seeing who they really are. In a very real sense, you become yourself when things are disintegrating all around you.
And let’s face it, more than levees broke in New Orleans. Social order broke. Police authority broke. Chain of command broke. Communications broke. All the structures we build to restrain the floodwaters of human behavior broke.
Who would you be if there were no rules? What would you do if there were no accountability? What would you get away with if you could get away with anything?
Some people got away with being martyrs. Some did heroic things. Some became heroes.
But some, if we believe Scott’s account, could think no higher than their crotches.
You have to wonder how that request for a peep show fell on those stranded women. Doubtless hungry, doubtless tired, doubtless bug-bitten and sun-baked, and doubtless scared that they might die here, drowned in fetid water or pierced by bullets.
You have to wonder whether they were stunned, angry, appalled. You have to wonder whether they found it hard to believe what was being asked of them. You even have to wonder whether maybe they considered lifting their shirts, figuring indignity a small price to pay for salvation.
But in the end, they said no.
We don’t know what became of them. Scott’s account ends with the boat motoring on and leaving the women stranded.
It is an image of petty opportunism, yes, but also one of quiet integrity, and it’s that part I choose to take with me as a reminder for when floodwaters recede and structures of artifice are put back in place.
Even in a broken time, some things did not break.

©2005 The Miami Herald
Leonard Pitts Jr. is a columnist for the Miami Herald. To reach him, send e-mail to lpitts@herald.com.

Walking symbol of failure...

This was noted in a recent article in the NY Times about the 45 people found dead in a hospital after being left for more than four days with nothing but temperatures exceeding 100 degrees in the wake of Katrina.

"Repercussions from the storm continued to echo in Washington, where the director of the Federal Emergency Management Agency, Michael D. Brown, a walking symbol to many people here of government failure in the crisis, resigned. Mr. Brown was relieved of his role in the day-to-day disaster operations here on Friday. (Related Article)"

Well that's funny...because I guess I would say that the "walking symbol" of failure would probably be good ole dubbya...but then logic doesn't seem to come into play in our "democracy" anymore...

Mike---YOU ROCK...

An open letter from Michael Moore to Dubbya - Just wanted to share...Mike...your my hero.

Friday, September 2nd, 2005

Dear Mr. Bush:

Any idea where all our helicopters are? It's Day 5 of Hurricane Katrina and thousands remain stranded in New Orleans and need to be airlifted. Where on earth could you have misplaced all our military choppers? Do you need help finding them? I once lost my car in a Sears parking lot. Man, was that a drag.

Also, any idea where all our national guard soldiers are? We could really use them right now for the type of thing they signed up to do like helping with national disasters. How come they weren't there to begin with?

Last Thursday I was in south Florida and sat outside while the eye of Hurricane Katrina passed over my head. It was only a Category 1 then but it was pretty nasty. Eleven people died and, as of today, there were still homes without power. That night the weatherman said this storm was on its way to New Orleans. That was Thursday! Did anybody tell you? I know you didn't want to interrupt your vacation and I know how you don't like to get bad news. Plus, you had fundraisers to go to and mothers of dead soldiers to ignore and smear. You sure showed her!

I especially like how, the day after the hurricane, instead of flying to Louisiana, you flew to San Diego to party with your business peeps. Don't let people criticize you for this -- after all, the hurricane was over and what the heck could you do, put your finger in the dike?

And don't listen to those who, in the coming days, will reveal how you specifically reduced the Army Corps of Engineers' budget for New Orleans this summer for the third year in a row. You just tell them that even if you hadn't cut the money to fix those levees, there weren't going to be any Army engineers to fix them anyway because you had a much more important construction job for them -- BUILDING DEMOCRACY IN IRAQ!

On Day 3, when you finally left your vacation home, I have to say I was moved by how you had your Air Force One pilot descend from the clouds as you flew over New Orleans so you could catch a quick look of the disaster. Hey, I know you couldn't stop and grab a bullhorn and stand on some rubble and act like a commander in chief. Been there done that.

There will be those who will try to politicize this tragedy and try to use it against you. Just have your people keep pointing that out. Respond to nothing. Even those pesky scientists who predicted this would happen because the water in the Gulf of Mexico is getting hotter and hotter making a storm like this inevitable. Ignore them and all their global warming Chicken Littles. There is nothing unusual about a hurricane that was so wide it would be like having one F-4 tornado that stretched from New York to Cleveland.

No, Mr. Bush, you just stay the course. It's not your fault that 30 percent of New Orleans lives in poverty or that tens of thousands had no transportation to get out of town. C'mon, they're black! I mean, it's not like this happened to Kennebunkport. Can you imagine leaving white people on their roofs for five days? Don't make me laugh! Race has nothing -- NOTHING -- to do with this!

You hang in there, Mr. Bush. Just try to find a few of our Army helicopters and send them there. Pretend the people of New Orleans and the Gulf Coast are near Tikrit.
Yours,
Michael MooreMMFlint@aol.com
www.MichaelMoore.com

P.S. That annoying mother, Cindy Sheehan, is no longer at your ranch. She and dozens of other relatives of the Iraqi War dead are now driving across the country, stopping in many cities along the way. Maybe you can catch up with them before they get to DC on September 21st.
---

A Good Story For a Change...

Good Morning Everybody

I just wanted to share this story. Its a positive news story in a time that is full with horror and tragedy. Just when I think humans are basically evil...someone restores my faith in mankind...

In New Orleans, human spirit overcomes horror

By Mark Egan 1 hour, 2 minutes ago

NEW ORLEANS (Reuters) - On a devastated street corner in a gritty New Orleans neighborhood an impromptu shrine stands as testament that even during the horror visited upon this city by Hurricane Katrina, kindness is not forgotten.

Made of bricks from a nearby building destroyed by the storm, the improvised structure protects a body that lies covered by a white sheet.
A cross fashioned of two pieces of wood found among nearby debris marks the site as a grave, albeit a temporary one. On the sheet covering the corpse are written the words "Here Lies Vera, God Help Us."

Before locals built this shrine, the woman had lain dead on the street. Her body was bloated and brutally distorted, untouched and ignored for almost a week by authorities who were working slowly to evacuate the thousands left homeless.
Since Katrina and the floods that followed hit New Orleans, the city has been struck by unexpected hardships.

Looting was rampant, refugee camps became the scenes of rapes, murders and robbery. Many lost everything and lacked even food and drinking water.
But as the worst appears to have passed and most of those left stranded have been evacuated, acts of kindness abound.

Dmitri Kachkov, a 35-year-old man who uses a wheelchair due to extreme physical disabilities, knows about hardship -- his family became refugees from Russia in 1997 and moved here.
When Katrina made them refugees again, they expected to sleep in their van. Just before the storm hit, Kachkov and his parents drove north and took refuge in a roadside truck stop.

Then a stranger -- Diana Cantello of Gramercy, Louisiana -- invited them to stay at her home.
"My mother cried at such unexpected hospitality," Kachkov said. They spent nine days and nights at Cantello's home, where a mother and her two children had also been invited to stay.
"Then yesterday it was my mother's 69th birthday and they baked her a cake and bought her small presents. My mother never expected such kindness, especially during this disaster," Kachkov said on Monday after his family returned to Metairie, Louisiana, to see how damaged their rental apartment was.

Near the Kachkov home is Drago's Seafood Restaurant.
Since the storm raged more than a week ago, five employees of the upscale eatery have lived on the premises to protect it from looters who have destroyed businesses across the city.
Then on Monday the restaurant reopened, serving charred chicken on pasta with a Cajun marinara sauce and ice-cold water -- a rare luxury in this city in recent days.
The food was free to anyone who wanted it.
"We have decided that we will serve free food as long as our resources last, probably until we give away $20,000 of free food," said owner Klara Cvitanovich.
Cvitanovich, 66, who came here from Croatia in her youth, was also shipping food out to poor neighborhoods.
"I can honestly say I have lived the American dream, and now I have to give something back," she said.

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Katrina children seeking parents shown on Web site Reuters

Reuters Photo: Daina (L), a New Orleans resident smokes a cigar outside the Johnny

LOOTING? MARSHAL LAW?OOPS! I MEAN RESCUE EFFORTS...

This is another thing that is just ludicrous. People are "looting" in New Orleans...well hell! I would too! Given the situation - I need to feed and take care of my family including food, water, medical supplies...and we are receiving little or no aid after we were herded into a stadium. People are dying right and left...there is NO running water, food, medicine, there is human feces and dead bodies everywhere I look - possibly one of my own relatives, children, or friends are laying next to me dead and rotting...hmmm....what would you do?

Prayers for New Orleans

Hi everyone - Sorry it has been a while since I have posted. I have been busy with many issues including job searching, getting the kiddo's back in school, and re-establishing my graduate studies. Plus I haven't been able to jog/run due to a back injury which has been depressing. Otherwise...

I have to mention that we should all be praying, donating, and doing anything we can to aid the people of New Orleans. What a horrific mess. Everyone seems so surprised that something like this can actually happen on "U.S. Soil"...I'm not. Look at our "leadership", look at where our country has been headed. If this is our response to a national disaster on our own soil (one where we cannot "blame" another country or "foreign" people) then what will happen in the future? You say we will learn from our mistakes? Oh really? Well it hasn't even been 30 years since Viet Nam ended...what are we doing again?

Anyway, I'm not going to rant. I just want to say that I am as sickened as everyone by what is happening. I can NOT imagine what they are going through. Put your own family into this situation. It could easily be ANY one of us and may still be. We are not protected anymore just by being "on U.S. soil". Our leadership or whatever it is... is not and will not be here "for the people". If they can't "control" us (i.e. push us back and herd us as we watch our children and family members die due to lack of water and disease running rampant in a disaster situation) what can we expect for the future?

The future is grim...the people existing (they are not "living" by any definition) in New Orleans right now are showing us our future. We don't need a crystal ball - just access to a TV or Computer where we can watch it on a live CNN feed.

More beauty...we NEED it.

Well after reading the news (again) this morning I am left feeling depressed (again) so I'm sharing more of my favorite pics...have a good day. Peace...b

Beauty in Our World

Aug 16 ~ 05
I've been thinking today - about some of the sad state of affairs on our planet. People dying in needless wars, the conflict over the Gaza Strip, the genocide in Africa...anyway - you get the grim picture. Anyway...I was cruisin the web and found some beautiful pics...and wanted to share. There is beauty in our world too - even though sometimes we have to look for it.
peace everyone
b